Reaching For The Moon

Reaching For The Moon
By: Linda Long

I was
Uncomfortable
I was
Frustrated
I was unhappy
And then
Then I got pissed off
I was pissed off
That my life
Was not
The way I wanted
It to be
I was frustrated
That I had
To change
I was unhappy
That I had
To let go
Of everything
I was convinced
Was meant for me
I tried to do
Damage control
A few months ago
I tried to stop
The emotional
Tidal wave
From taking over
I tried to stop
It from escalating
The harder
I tried
The more frustrated
I got
Until I couldn’t remember
What I was fighting for
As I became
More aware
Of my feelings
I could no longer
Ignore the truths
Truths in my life
The truth was
I changed
Therefore,
Things had to change
I was transforming
Into a better version
Of myself
I was
Seeing all the opportunities
For growth and expansion
I was becoming aware
Of every unfulfilled area of my life
I starting seeing
Things clearly
I was feeling
The emptiness
Of every void
In my life
I knew
I couldn’t ignore the
Truth anymore
My body
Started breaking
From the stress
Of trying to hold on
So tight
My body
Started clenching
Trying to hold back
Words and feelings
As I wrestled
With choices
I prayed
And prayed
Meditated
Chanted
Slept and went inward
Looking for answers
And all I heard
Was
Follow the signs
Cautiously
Timidly
I started following
The signs
As they led me
To one bridge after
Another in my life
At each one
I contemplate
If I should cross
I asked myself
Should I stay
On this side
It’s safe
I am unfulfilled
But
At least
I don’t have to
Change or let go
Should I cross over
I don’t know
What’s like
Over there
I don’t know anyone
I will miss
What I leave behind
My heart
Isn’t sure
It can start over
My soul
Doesn’t want to
Let go
I am comfortable here
It’s ok to stay
Right?
I deserve
To be happy
And fulfilled

I heard the voice
Within
Whisper to me
I am capable
Of doing more

It Rang true
In my heart
It’s no longer
Comfortable for me here

I knew it was the truth
As the words
Flashed across
My mind
As I accept
That it is time for
Me to welcome
Change and transformation
Into my life
I pray
I am strong enough
To let go
Of what no longer
Is meant for me
And courageous
Enough to
Open up to
New possibilities
As I welcome
The new version
Of myself
Just over the horizon
I hear
I can
I will
I must
Make a difference

And so the decision
Was made
To cross the bridge
Being thankful
For every experience
And growth opportunity
I had along
The way
Thankful
To the people
Who God brough
Into my life
As teachers, mentors and friends
I trust and have faith
Those who are meant
To be in my life
Forever
Will remain
What is meant to be
Will find a way to be
I pray
For protection
Blessings
And the support
Of those who
Care about me
As I choose to
Try something new
Not sure
Of what’s
On the other side
But knowing
I can’t stay
On this side anymore
I can no longer
Play small
And accept less
Than I want and deserve
It’s time
For me to open up
And reach for
The moon and stars
Within my own soul
It’s time to welcome
Something better in my life
It’s time I welcome
A new version of myself
A healthier, happier
And more fulfilled
Version of myself
It’s time
For change
(C) 2017 Linda A. Long – All Rights Reserved

Life is best when lived passionately

NOTE

If you are a regular reader of my blog, you may have noticed I removed several posts. This is because I thought the journal entries had too much information about my personal life in them. If someone Googles me and finds a blog of poety and essays, that’s ok. But I don’t want folks finding every detail of my life. While I am still keeping a journal with those thoughts in them, it’s set to private. I guess you can tell by this poem, it’s a time of change in my life. I’ve decided I can no longer play small. I deserve to be happy and fulfilled. I am nervous and excited to see what will happen but it’s now too uncomfortable for me to stay as is.

This entry was posted in Change, Love, Sex & Poetry Collection, Poetry and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.