YAY Me! 

I don’t often celebrate my victories. I very rarely announce my successes. Today I speak openly that I am proud of what I’ve accomplished the last few months. I am proud of the hard work I did to change my life for the better. I am proud to say I am stronger than my fears.

Many won’t understand my accomplishments. Some will think my hard work was no big deal but I’ve learned to block out the noise around me. I’ve learned nothing really matters without love. My hard work involved facing demons from my past, conquering fears, reaching for something better in my life, opening myself to love and doing it all sober!

In the last few months I’ve:

Managed a pretty serious Depression without medication. I only took a Xanax occasionally to help me sleep when I was exceptionally restless🙏

I stood in the middle of the biggest emotional storm of my life sober. I did not drink or get high to numb the pain. I did not run away or go away to escape my real life. I stood right here in the middle of the shit happening around me and inside me. I stood there sober and felt it. By feeling it sober I was able to work on healing it. When you keeping moving, you are avoiding. I stood still and felt it🙏

I had an uncomfortable but necessary conversation with Mother to redefine our relationship from a place of truth, honesty, responsibility and accountability. I wasn’t trying to hold her feet at the fire. I was trying to set us both free from the past we never spoke about. We are closer because of this conversation🙏

I worked through my fear of loss so I can be a support for my best friend who has Stage IV Cancer🙏

I confronted my trust issues with men to heal & be open to and ready for a relationship🙏

I set boundaries in my family🙏

I gave my sister emotional and financial support through a crisis even while I was in my own personal storm🙏

I took a shot at work, submitted a proposal through appropriate channels and made the effort to stand on my own. I’m not completely sure how this is playing out just yet but I knew I had to stand on my own so people would not perceive I had or expected any special treatment. I am completely accountable and responsible for my actions and expect nothing but fair consideration at the appropriate time🙏

I found a new level of love within myself during my separation from my heart’s blue eyed desire. Absence does seem to make the heart grow founder🙏

I am working on giving forgiveness to a man who never asked for it. He is now in need of my help and support. I ask myself “How can I show him compassion in his suffering when he caused so much pain in my life?” The answer is I’m not sure I can but he’s changed and I’ve changed. I still need boundaries between us. I also will not be in a room alone with him but maybe I can work towards finding compassion for him. It’s a painful complicated issue for me🙏

Today, I talked to my therapist about getting through these complexities dead sober. No happy pills, no happy hour, no escape sex. I didn’t numb myself to get through it. I felt it. Lived it. I Healed it and I am damn proud of myself because of it. People wonder why I’ve been stressed out. Well, life hasn’t been easy lately but I rose to the challenge and changed the course of my life for the better by doing the hard painful work. I did it. Yay me!🙏

Sobriety is sobriety for whatever reason you choose it. I quit drinking because it made me sick. It was holding me back from living my best life. It was an escape. It kept me from feeling pain and healing my past. It had to go. I am not, nor have I ever been, an alcoholic. I’ve never gone to a meeting nor do I have or need a sponsor. Drinking was an option to me not a necessity. I freely admit I abused alcohol to numb myself and escape but it was always optional for me. I never needed a drink but five years sobriety is five years sobriety. I am damn proud of myself🙏One of my very best friends drunk dialed me at 10pm to congratulate me on my five years of sobriety😂😂😂 She was hammered and wanted to celebrate my sobriety😂😂I hope you see the humor in that. We thought it was pretty funny. I absolutely love her and crack up at her drunk calls and three martini text messages😂😂

What have you done to change your life? Have you celebrated your victories lately? Have you said, “YAY, Me?”

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Life Is Best When Lived Passionately 

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