This has been a challenging weekend so far and it’s only 5:30am on Sunday morning. I felt pretty good Friday. My stomach was cooperative and I slept pretty good. I was hopeful to have a normal Saturday.
When I work up on Saturday morning, I noticed a slight headache over my right eye. As a lifelong migraine sufferer, I was familiar with the pain. I knew if I didn’t catch it, I could be in a lot of pain later in the day. I took medicine, ate a decent breakfast, had some caffeine, hydrated, walked three miles and went food shopping. A slight headache was still lingering and my belly was feeling full and bloated even though I didn’t eat a lot.
As I was driving home from the grocery store my former roommate called me to ask if I knew if my old friend, Nancy, passed away. She saw something on Facebook. I immediate felt my stomach start churning;my head and heart both started pounding. When I got home, I got in touch with a friend and Nancy’s family. She died Friday night from complications from Stage IV Bile Duct Cancer that already spread to her Liver. I knew she had Cancer. It’s actually a reoccurrence. She had Lung Cancer the first time about five years ago. The truth is had no idea she was that sick and struggling. I had no idea. She didn’t post much on Facebook. Admittedly, I don’t read as much on Facebook as I used to. It stresses me out seeing so much information. I limit my Facebook time and activities. I guess I missed it. With me not really keeping in touch with the group of friends Nancy and moved in, I just didn’t know. It bothered me, it upset me I didn’t know. I would have reached out to her. I would have helped her. I heard she had financial problems because she couldn’t work. If I knew, I would have helped her🙏😢
Nancy and I socialized in a group of friends from about 2000 to about 2011 which was when I stopped drinking and bar hopping. One of our close friends died from complications with Crohn’s Disease in 2007. Nancy and I were always fond of each other; our lives just moved in different directions. She even called me last summer about maybe renting in my building. We held no hard feelings; we were just making different choices. I loved her as friend. She was sweet, happy, kind and it just makes me sick Cancer took another close friend.
The news of Nancy’s death also stressed me out because I’ve been having my own health challenges the last month. I just had an Upper a Endoscopy on Thursday where the doctor took four biopsies of my stomach. While I feel pretty sure, I don’t have stomach Cancer, this shook me up and made my mind go to dark place. By 5:00pm, my head was killing me, I was throwing up the little bit of food and water I had on Saturday morning. I just kept thinking of Nancy and worrying about why my stomach is so fucked up.
When the doctor talked to me after my procedure on Thursday, he said he saw irregularities and could see why I wasn’t feeling well but also said he didn’t think it was “serious”. He told me he did the biopsies precautionary and to look for bacteria that could be causing my problem. He told me he would give me treatment plan in my follow up appointment and that I should continue taking the two meds he gave me until the appointment. I still feel pretty confident I do not have Cancer as there is none in my family. It’s just the news about Nancy freaked me out as I am waiting on biopsy results myself.
The last time my stomach was this bad was five years ago. That’s when and why I stopped drinking alcohol, stopped smoking and gave up Gluten. My belly has been stabilized for three years. That’s why I don’t really understand what happened to set this off. That’s why it stresses me out bit. I felt good for three years. I even put back on some weight because I was enjoying food so much 😂😂 I am dropping weight again. While I’m excited I will soon be able to fit into my favorite skinny jeans from 2013 again, every time I step on the scale I am reminded I’m losing the weight because I’m sick again.
I suppose the good thing that came out of it, it made me check-in and reconnect with old friends. My former roommate and I gave each other some good support on Saturday. I also realized over the last week there is really no reason for me to move in January unless the landlord ends the lease. My little shopping cart makes bringing my groceries up to the 7th floor from the parking lot easier. I can even deal with going downstairs to do laundry as long as I go during off-hours. Most importantly, the employees in my building have been so sweet, thoughtful and helpful to me throughout this last month. They even told me I’m one of their favorite residents because I’m sweet, nice, respectful, polite and a good tipper😂👍All I have to do is call the front desk if I need someone❤️
The migraine broke around 4:00am after I took a Tylenol 3 and drank a cup of full caffeine black coffee. I combined the pill with the caffeine which seemed to work. I was able to eat cereal and soy milk around 5:00am. The caffeine has me wide awake so I am writing this all out. I imagine I probably will be going back to bed and taking it easy the rest of the day. If you are reading this blog, please consider holding me in your prayers. It’s been a challenging month. While I’m hanging in there, it’s harder some days than others. Also, I’m waiting on biopsy results. I am praying for the simple bacteria my Doctor mentioned. That would be easy to fix🙏
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Life Is Best When Lived Passionately